Three Victoria cats are carrying out a Cold War with their human owners, over of all things — a box.
“We bought a Vitamix on Black Friday. It arrived on December 16th and we brought it in. I set it on the floor just for a quick second, and that was almost a month ago,” said Jessica Gerson-Neeves.
Their three cats – Max, George “Destroyer of Worlds”, and Lando Calrissian are keeping the box under a careful 24-hour guard.
“There are some battles for dominance of the Vitamix box,” said Nikii Gerson-Neeves, Jessica’s wife.
“Oh yeah, sometimes shift changes are peaceful, sometimes they are, less peaceful,” added Jessica.
The self-proclaimed ‘middle-aged lesbians’ thought it was funny, took a picture, and posted it in the 900,000-plus-member group “THIS CAT IS C H O N K Y.”
“I looked at it and was like, this is definitely ‘Breaking News’ and I wrote it as such,” said Jessica. “The post blew up, and I’ve written what’s essentially a news update on what has been going on every day since!”
Tens of thousands of likes, shares, comments, “Appliancegate” even caught the eye of the Washington Post.
“Cats go viral all the time, but you don’t expect it to be your cats,” said Nikii.
Now, almost one month later, the standoff continues. The Vitamix blender, still trapped inside.
“We don’t mind being patient, because the blender will still be there,” said Jessica. “Joy is a lot harder to find these days than a blender.”
Vitamix later joined in on the joke, sending three empty boxes to end the terrifying hostage situation.
But, the fun continues.
“None of it is important but all of it is,” mused Jessica, considering the impact of her posts. “It’s funny wholesome and unexpected and ridiculous, and who doesn’t need that right now!”
Three cats, two middle-aged lesbians, and one box, giving people a much-needed moment to step outside their own box and laugh.
Kori Sidaway
